Tackling Skinny Souls
by Colored Sabotage
Summary: She had been looking for so long that when the moment came, she wasn't even sure she found him. /Siblingfic/


Jake had offered to come with her this time. But it was only a gesture, because both of them knew that Leah would send him home to Nessie with a firm shake of her head. And send him back she did, with a final shutting of her car before she drove off into the night.

_Leah watched him from the kitchen. He sat on her porch, almost immobile. She could see every inch of him crumbling, caving in. Leah had grown used to this: His need to be alone, his biting retorts, his pain. She had grown used to the fact that when he saw her coming, he would rebuff her and fend her off. She had grown used to the fact that when he saw her coming, he wouldn't let her get too close._

Even though she knew the danger was not in the woods, but inside his head, Leah always watched the trees as she drove by. She had the timing down perfectly. Perhaps she could do nothing but watch him on the porch, but she would be damned if she wasn't going to protect him.

_She had considered all kinds of tactics when she first met Nicole. They ranged from friendly to violent to verbal threats to demonstrating the punishment first, and asking questions later. She had experienced nothing as painful as the fear she felt when she watch him imprint on Claire's best friend's older sister: A whirlwind of wavy locks, an open face, and a pair of bright brown eyes that matched his constant gleeful disposition._

_She had watched his gravity shift in the middle of Claire's birthday party. It had happened somewhere between Nicole lighting the candles on Claire's birthday cake and Leah scooping out the ice cream. The spilling of punch in front of her alerted her to the scene fast unfolding two feet away from her hands, and when she found his new reason for existence, it was all she could do to not hurl the ice cream scooper at Nicole's face._

_She watched Quil pat him on the back, and she watched Emily lead Nicole into the kitchen to explain the details of the fairytale bonding. She hadn't even noticed she was crying until Claire hugged her legs tightly._

"_You're not losing him, Auntie Leah. You know that, right?" She had smiled at her favorite kid and nodded, hugging her tightly. Without another word Leah handed the ice cream scoop to Jacob, who only patted her shoulder, and went into Claire's room to cry._

But despite her loathing of imprinting, Leah had gotten better. In fact, she had loved Nicole. Despite her upbeat look, she was not afraid to speak what was on her mind. Nicole had been there the day Emily was complaining about Leah's resistance to being in her wedding, and when Embry told Leah that Nicole reasoned to Emily that it was because the bride was a home-wrecking traitor and that the groom was a selfish prick, Leah, at that moment, could have kissed her. Leah and Nicole would have become best friends if her imprint bond did not come first. But Leah ran a close second, and it was the first time in a while that being second didn't bother her.

She drove around the back of the bar, and parked her car. Leah looked at the clock - It was only eleven p.m. Leah reasoned that by now he had gone through the whole bottle of whiskey, and was ordering another. She had the timing down perfectly - It would take him only fifteen more minutes before the alcohol worked through his system, before his defenses started crumbling again. She sighed, and ran her hands through her hair. She fiddled with the radio, brushed the dust off her dashboard, and glanced at the clock again. 11:11.

_C'mon you guys. Make a wish. He and Leah exchanged a glance, before moving to copy Nicole. All three had their eyes shut tightly, and even though Leah hadn't made a wish on these numbers since her father's death, she found herself wishing for his absolute happiness - and for the two of them to stay together forever._

_She remembered every conversation that day...even the ones on the porch at three a.m. Even though he was sixteen, she still waited for him. She needed to know he was safe._

"_Lee...I thought you were in bed." She shook her head._

"_I was worried." He smiled at her._

"_You're always worried about me."_

"_I can't help it. Mom's not around much anymore...and someone has to keep you and Nicole out of trouble." She winked playfully at him and laughed at how the blush creeped around his neck._

"_B-but- we...w-w-we weren't -" Leah simply shushed him with a wave of her hand, her politest way of telling him she didn't really want to know about his sex life._

"_I'm glad you're home safe, Seth." Leah walked back into the house, letting the screen shut behind her._

11:16. It's time, she thought. She met one of the bartenders at the back door, who let her in without any fuss. Leah looked down, only muttering a thank you. Every time she looked, the girl reminded her of Nicole, and the first time she tracked him down here, she didn't even need to question him why he chose this bar. If this was the girl who served him whiskey and beer, Leah didn't even need to wonder.

She waded her way through the back of the bar, taking her time to sit at a table or two when she thought he'd turn around. The last thing she needed was for him to catch her here, when he could still recognize her. She had grown used to the fact that when he saw her coming, he wouldn't let her get too close.

Like every night, she made her move between his second and third bottle of whiskey, when she knew his mind hovered between drunk and unconscious, when she knew that for a little while, the chinks in his armor would open up, large enough for her to slip her hand through to grasp his own tightly.

"_Seth." She used to call his name, until he recognized who the voice was every Friday night at 11:30. That's when he began running. The first time he ran away from her, she felt complete despair. She had been looking out for him, helping him grow up for years, and the only thing she could do now was watch him run. It hurt her, but she knew the pain she felt would only ever be a fraction of his._

_So she began running after him. The first time Leah caught him in her arms, it had been from a side tackle. It brought back memories of their football games with Embry, Quil, and Jacob, except now the man she was holding was trembling, the warning signs of phasing already running down his spines, his arms, even taking a hold of his legs._

_But Leah never let go. She whispered stories of them, of him, her, and Nicole, and she calmed Seth down with every tactic she could think of. But she would never, ever let go of her baby brother._

The newest tactic was acting like she didn't know him. She would slide onto the barstool right next to his, order a double shot of tequila, and complain about the quality of limes that the bar served. The first few times she did this, not even a glance was spared her way. But tonight, he pulled a lime from his pocket before she even opened her mouth, and rolled it her way.

She picked it up, letting it roll in the palm of her hand, before settling on a "Thanks." He only nodded, and she felt him watch her as the left the lime untouched, and her shots, undrunk.

"You don't come here to drink." She willed herself not to look at him, she was hoping that he thought he was talking to a stranger.

"Leah, I told you to stop waiting up for me." But when he sent the final punch to break her stoic expression, he broke his own wall down by doing so. Seeing the moment, she lunged, wrapping her arms around his torso, taking advantage of the fact that his statement sounded more like a whine, an inside joke, than an angry accusation.

She didn't care that he knew it was her for all these nights. She didn't care if, now that he had acknowledged this new way of getting to him, that she would have to start running after him again. She thought of nothing but him, because he was finally allowing her to hug him.

"_Stay away from me!" He roared, the tears trickling down his face. The remains of a vampire laid behind him, forgotten, until Embry and Quil began to burn the pieces. Leah had no idea what to do, but she knew what had happened._

_She stared at the scene in horror. A vampire, shredded to pieces from what looked like an agonizing hour of slow torture. Her baby brother, curled around a drained corpse, lifeless and cold. She tried to hug him, but he pushed her away for the first time since they were toddlers. He was in pain, and for the first time, nothing she could do would fix this. And so she did all she could. She sat on the other side of Nicole's body, the tears pouring out her eyes, but all the while she watched her brother._

When he sighed, his body starting to fold around her, she fought against her urge to stiffen. She felt his arms wrap around her back, and she understood that he was finally hugging her back. She knew that nothing would come close to this moment in a while, and even though she would have complained that he wasn't hugging tight enough in some other memory, she knew that in reality, she had to take whatever she could get.

She was even more surprised when she was able to lean his massive body against hers. She noticed with worry that his temperature had spiked, his height had grown, and his muscles had grown more massive. From the legends, she had imagined the loss of an imprint as a stone, crushing and deflating the body until they withered slowly away. But as she looks at her baby brother with concern, Leah thinks that losing an imprint only tears down his soul, but builds every other part of him up so no one can get to it.

She got him to the car, when his drowsy eyes opened wildly. She had been drinking in the fact that their bodies had been in contact for exactly five minutes and twenty three seconds, when he pulled away from her.

"No...No Lee. Leah, no. Don't make me go back, I can't. Not there." She watched him move backwards, away from her and the car.

"Seth -"

"No!" He cried out. "Leah...Leah she's everywhere. She's in every fucking building on the reservation, and she's climbing every fucking tree in the woods, and she's jumping off every fucking cliff and _fuck_Leah, every sandcastle on that damned beach was made by her and Claire." She could only watch as her brother's armor rebuilt itself. She searched his face wildly for another chink, just one more, so she could push herself through again and hold him.

"Lee - Leah I can't." There. The tear rolled down his cheek and this time her tackle reminded her of the time Nicole hugged Seth when they returned from hunting an entire coven on their land. She could feel the wild beating in his chest and she was sure he was remembering the same things.

"I know you can't Seth. I've been look out for you for seventeen years. I've - That's all I can do anymore though, is _watch_. Because every time I move, I scare you away and damnit Seth I know that no one can understand the pain you feel, and I _know_ your soul was ripped to shreds as soon as that _fucking leech_ touched her but Seth -" She was now fighting him more than ever. The dust and rocks from the pavement pressing into his back, into her palms, as both of them were fighting each other. Leah was trying to make eye contact with Seth who was doing everything he could to look away from her.

"But Seth...I'm your sister. I'm the one who punched Derek in the face when he called you stupid. I'm the girl who would change your fish tank out with a snake cage and watch you scream when you thought your fish was a shifter...And I'm the girl who would help you with your math homework and I'm the one who taught you how to play basketball and you can bet your sorry ass that I was at every single game cheering for you the loudest.

And you're my brother...the guy who punched Sam in the face when he broke up with me. You're the idiot who always eats my last piece of apple pie and the dumbass who broke my sled in the winter, my wagon in the summer, and got my soccer ball stuck in that oak tree when you were seven. And you're the seven year old who broke his arm trying to get it back out of the tree. You're the only one who's ever been there for me since forever because that's what siblings do Seth.

They annoy each other to death, they pull the meanest pranks, the give the best gifts and they offer the best advice...but sometimes Seth...sometimes they can't offer any advice." The tears were pouring down now...Both faces were covered in dirt and tears and it only made Leah cry harder.

"Sometimes the only thing they can do is watch their baby brother fall apart because she knows that she will never be able to heal the pain he's feeling and she knows that Nicole is gone but whenever she walks into this bar she thinks that Nicole is the one letting her in because that _fucking bartender_ has the same exact haircut as her and it hurts her that Nikki is gone because it only hurts her more because her brother is tearing herself apart and she can't even do anything about it but watch...

when all she wants to do is help."

_She watched the scene play out again...and again. She watched her brother's fist connect with Paul's nose, and she watched him almost go for Rachel before Paul attempted to throw a punch himself._

_That was when Leah stepped in, wrapping her arms around her brother, not even trying to raise her voice above his._

"_You said she'd be safe you asshole. You and Rachel said she would be okay with you. And now she's dead! Because a fucking leech got to her neck when you were supposed to be keeping her safe!"_

"_Seth! We're sorry! We didn't mean -" With a swift glare and a look of pity from Leah, Rachel stopped. There was nothing Rachel would say that would calm him, and anything else would enrage him. She struggled to push her brother out the door, but when she tried to get Jake to help her, Seth threw him into the wall._

"_Look, Seth. I'm sorry - There's nothing we can - Nicole was-" A punch this time was delivered to the wall, almost catching Leah's head before she ducked out of the way._

"_You're not fit to ever whisper her name you shithead!" She almost lost her grip on Seth when Jared tried to comfort him._

"_Look, I understand how you feel...Emily was, when I hurt her-" This time, Leah let go on purpose. The rage in Seth was uncontrollable, and she'd be damned if she was going to let Sam compare Nicole's death to Emily's disfigured face._

"_YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING. I didn't HURT her Sam. Nicole is dead! Where is Emily, huh? Baking a batch of fucking muffins! She's alive damn it, and my imprint is DEAD. Drained dry by a fucking leech! You...you have no IDEA about this pain. Your FUCKING SOUL is still intact. YOU'RE STILL OKAY AND EMILY IS STILL ALIVE. Nicole...Damn it, Nicole is fucking _dead."

_Leah had watched Seth collapse on their living room floor, and when Sam went to comfort him she only stood in front of him. Her eyes were focused on the man who made her brother pass out, but she addressed everyone._

"_I know this isn't directly anyone's fault. But when our mother persuaded us to go to Port Angeles to help her plan her wedding, Seth left Nicole in Paul and Rachel's care. Through some turn of events, she ended up as a drained corpse in the woods, and it wasn't any of _you_ who ended the vampire, it was Seth and I. I have absolutely no idea who's patrol it was or whose house the leech took her from, but it is our _calling_ to stop these kind of attacks. We have not lost a human to a vampire since the pack was formed and I want to know_ why_ a pack of wolves couldn't dismember one vampire and save an imprint." Leah held up her hand to stop any protests, and for the first time her eyes looked around the room._

"_If this was any other type of circumstance, I would apologize for Seth's behavior, but Nicole is dead. There will be no apology coming from the Clearwaters when we so clearly trusted the pack to keep Nicole safe for a few measly hours. Now get the hell out of our house before Seth comes to and I let him rip every one of you to shreds."_

"If there was any way I could bring her back I _would_ Seth. If there was anything I could do for you to make this better I would but I know that there's nothing I can do but follow you to these creep-filled bars and watch you sit on the porch just so I _know_ you're physically safe. And Seth -"

The struggle of bodies had stopped, and Leah loosened her grip on her brother. Every minute of her life she hated that she couldn't help Seth like a sister should be able to - But she wasn't dumb and these were no ordinary family circumstances. Not every sister has to watch her brother's imprint be murdered by a vampire, and not every sister has to watch her brother endure the rest of his life without her. Perhaps she could do nothing for him until 11:36 on Friday nights, but she would be damned if she wouldn't be there on the dot, on any given week.

She watched him finally pull his gaze towards her, and his defeated look made her eyes well up even more. So she did the only thing she could do - Leah pulled her brother into a hug and tightened her grip when his tears began to fall on her shoulder. It was all she could do to whisper quietly into his ear, into the wind, into the darkened world around them,

"I'm so sorry Seth."

* * *

_Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns all the rights to this series and its characters, pas moi._


End file.
